I WANT!!

I enjoy watching college football.  I don't  understand the rules completely, and I am confused when Kevin starts talking about different offenses and defenses.  I don't even know the names of each of the players (like lineman, receiver, tight end, etc.)  But in spite of being somewhat of a football ignoramus, I enjoy watching college football games.

The end of the year used to be a fun time as there are a bunch of bowl games with good teams participating. But a few years ago, we observed an unsettling trade...namely, that ESPN was broadcasting most of the games and therefore only cable customers could watch the bowls.  That trend has continued and this year, all but 3 bowl games were on ESPN.

We don't have cable, and have never had cable during our 15 and a half years of marriage.  That obviously was a deliberate decision. Cable is expensive, and I have a tendency towards watching too much television.  We decided when we got married that we would remove temptation and just not have cable.  The result is that we watch the occasional football game, weather reports, and the Olympics.  That is pretty much it.  We watch DVD's and a few things on Amazon Prime so we do watch shows, but not nearly as much as we would if we had cable.

99.5% of the time, I have no desire for cable, and I love saving the money.  But every once in a blue moon, I REALLY want cable.

Monday evening of this week, I REALLY wanted cable.  The bowl championship game was on, between Alabama and Notre Dame, and I wanted to watch it.

I wanted, I wanted, I wanted!!

I know this sounds SO whiny, but I was feeling very unhappy about not being able to see the game.  It has been a couple of tough weeks with illness and I just wanted to kick back and relax and watch the game.  Is that too much to ask?

I don't know if you ever get like that, but I do.  I'll be feeling stressed or unhappy or angry and my brain latches on to SOMETHING that, I think, will make me happy.  I feel like I deserve it.  I felt like I deserved to watch that game because I was tired and stressed and other people get to watch the bowl championship game. (Of course, I knew we CHOSE not to get cable but I was still feeling grumpy and whiny!)

I gave myself a good talking to on Monday, and was mostly at peace about not seeing the game.  That evening, when Kevin got home from work, I mentioned that tonight was the game but of course we wouldn't be able to see it.

He looked around online and discovered that he could sign up for a 4 hour free ESPN app for our Google Nexus 7.  So we were able to watch the game!

And here's the irony.  It was a TERRIBLE GAME.

Boring.

Dreadful.

Dull.

Painful.

I was sort of rooting for Notre Dame because I am tired of Alabama winning, but I didn't care that much. All we wanted was fun football and we didn't see it.  Alabama creamed Notre Dame. It was as dull as watching paint dry (unless you were an Alabama or Notre Dame fan, in which case it was either great fun or very frustrating.)

I thought it was a beautiful life lesson for me.  Here I was, latching on to the idea that I NEEDED to watch the game, and then it wasn't fun. 

It was an excellent reminder that when I get really excited about something and feel I NEED it, I almost certainly do not!  I mean, I need the Lord all the time.  But I don't really need...my kid to read well at age 6, or my toddler potty trained right now, or a book that I want to read right now, etc.

Whenever I feel like I MUST have something RIGHT NOW to make me happy, I'm off base.  Like the Apostle Paul, I need to content in all circumstances.