Monday, April 6, 2015

Growing Weary

Galatians 6:9New International Version (NIV)

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

  The Bible is full of great verses.  The one above has always seemed wise, but I didn't really understand it well.  I am a very compulsive, hardworking person and I didn't understand "growing weary of doing good."  I could imagine being lazy, or selfish, or sinful, which would lead to "not doing good".  But what does "growing weary" have to do with it?

I am now 45, and I understand.  Let me talk about ONE LITTLE THING -- fights between little people.

We have 9 children.  The first six each had ABOUT 18 months gap between successive babies.  Then between our 6th and 7th baby was a 3+ year gap (with 3 miscarriages between those births.)  #7 and #8 are 18 months apart again, and then #8 and #9 are just a bit over 2 years apart.

So we've had many 18 month gaps.  I don't know if that gap is particularly significant, but it sure seems like little people with that age span fight a lot.

So Sarah and Daniel are fighting a lot.  They quarrel over toys. They scream.  They hit.

And I've done this before.  Oh, so many times. I am weary of dealing with it constructively and wisely.  I just wish they'd get along.  They are so immature!  What is with that?  It is like they toddlers and preschoolers or something!  Oh right, they ARE toddlers and preschoolers.

I know in my brain that this is totally age appropriate behavior. They are learning boundaries, and learning to share, and learning that life does not revolve around them.  Great lessons.  Wonderful lessons.  Valuable lessons.

And I need to not grow weary in doing good. I need to keep working with my little ones just as well as I worked with our older ones when they were that age.

But I confess I'm at the point where I know more than ever that I need the Lord's strength to be a good mother in this area.  I'm just tired of it.  I don't want to deal with it anymore. I just want them to get along.  Barring that (which is impossible) I sometimes just want to let their interactions run a natural course. But the natural course is that the big one hits or hurts the small one and gets the toys in question, which isn't a good result.  So every time it happens, I need to pick myself up and deal with it.  Constructively and wisely.

Only God can give me that strength.  And He does.  And I know He will.  We've still got Rose coming up the pipeline and in a year she'll probably be screaming and hitting.  

Lord, please give me the strength to be a consistent, loving, wise, CONSISTENT mother.

No comments: